When Did I Become an Adult?

Probably, you may not be familiar with the word “Adult”, unless you usually visit the “P” website for happy hour.

Actually I did not realize that I had become an adult until recently. Let me tell you about a few moments that struck me.

Being an adult usually means having responsibilities. The feeling came to me when My wife gave birth to our little baby. I felt as if I had been struck by a lightning. My brain went blank completely, and I was like a moron. I did not know what to do. I did not know how to look after both my wife and baby. I did not know how to change the diaper nor how to comfort my wife. If without the help from my parents and parents in law, I would completely broke.

At that time, I was still pursuing my PhD degree. I can’t earn any money even for the diaper of my baby. Luckily, I graduated three months after my baby was born, and finally found a job. With payment monthly, I found that I can afford that we call a family.

My working place is far from my hometown, where our baby was born. A few months later, we reunited in the renting room close to my working place. I went to work routinely everyday, while my wife looked after our baby at home. I felt I owed her a lot. Because at that time she was weak after giving birth, however she had to do babysitting. Event though I can sometimes rushed home where there were emergency situations. Once, our baby pooped, however, my wife was too weak to change the diaper, I went home immediately, changed the diaper and went back to work again.

Speaking of the job, you know, after graduated from PhD, you just got a temporary one in China in some cases. So those years, I did hard work in the daytime, looked after baby after work and moved on to do work over night after my wife and baby both went to sleep. Actually, I did not have much feelings like tired or harsh, not until those memories come back. For like three years, I found that I had been aged like ten years. I think that explains why I did not wrote any blogs, probably because my life was just full of … life.

Our baby was often sick, we have to take him to the hospital almost every month. When he was three, he was dignosed with a severe viral effection. We spent weeks in the hospital, my wife was devastated when the doctor issued what we feared was a death notice. She cried almost uncontrollably. Luckily, he eventually recovered.

Things have been geting better in recent years. Because the infant has grown into a teenager. But troubles did not fade away. Conflicts often occurred between us and our son. And we worried a lot about his future, as we found that he is probably not a straight-A student. Moreover, health issues struck my wife, parents and grand parents.

Usually I have this feeling that I was still a boy. When I was young, I noticed that being a kid was quite different from being an adult. My parents were quite strong and tough, even when they were just in their twenties. However, we I turned into my thirties, I still felt like being in a role playing game. Everything is like part of the game.

I looked into the mirror, when I was taking shower, my loose skin and popped belly were yelling for the truth.

No matter what, I am still in a game called life, but my role has changed.