The Freedom of Being Yourself...

Diane Shiffer as a self-described “oddball” in junior high, circa 1967 or 1968.

The older I get, the more I understand that it’s okay to live a life that others don’t understand. Don’t be afraid to be your whole self, my darlings.

I’ve always been a bit of an oddball. As a kid I wore weird glasses. I had braces. I sang way too loudly and way out of tune. I was chubby and really, really, really bad at sports. I was called “weird” to my face more times than I can even count. That used to sting, but somehow not so much anymore. In fact, not at all anymore. I’m not even sure when it happened, but sometime along the way I learned to love that weird little fat girl that I was (and still am, truth be told).Subscribe now

Loving her has helped me discover my true essence. Because here’s the thing, my darlings: As long as you’re limited by what others find acceptable or appealing, you’ll never have enough room to stretch out and become who you’re actually meant to be. You’ll be too busy checking to see if your edges are showing, too busy adjusting yourself. To avoid being too much, you’ll be too busy asking for permission to be exactly what the world needs you to be, your gloriously weird, sparkling, sideways self.

When I was growing up and even in college, being a weirdo wasn’t convenient. It wasn’t fashionable or cute or empowering or the sort of thing you put on a tote bag. It was just hard.

I remember thinking, maybe I’ll grow out of this. Maybe one day I’ll learn how to laugh less often, learn not to care so intensely about every little thing. Learn to dole out my smiles more judiciously and nod thoughtfully in all the appropriate conversational moments. Maybe I’ll stop being the girl who got weird looks for reading vintage homemaking guides for entertainment and collecting 1940s hankies. But surprise! I grew up and I’m still that girl, still weird.

I didn’t fit in. I didn’t like the things I was supposed to like. In college, I was maybe a bit too good with the…